I was so excited the other day thinking that the end is nearing and our babies will be here soon. I told my OB that I know I have hounded her about how truly important it is to me for them to get to 38 weeks, but I admitted to her at the last appointment that I think I would die if I had to go that long (serious discomfort has begun, like crawling to the bathroom in the night to pee because it hurts to stand discomfort).
I want to hold my babies, I want to kiss them, and I want to know that they are healthy and perfect in every way. I also want my body and my health back. I have had hormones injected into me and tons of drugs taken and then side effects a plenty for the last several years. I have lived at the doctor and can't wait to be free of it and finally have what we've wanted and just get to live our lives.
The end is near!
But it's the end, the real "end." The end with a huge period at the conclusion of the sentence. We have decided for a variety of reasons that we will not attempt to get pregnant ever again and once I am done breastfeeding I will be back on the pill. So it's starting to become strange when I think about it. I feel like I have been pregnant for a very long time, but it seems a little sad to know that I will never feel little monkey's moving around in my belly again. I will never go to an ultrasound super excited to find out what's going on. I know I have much more exciting things to look forward to than this now that we will have our babies, but I'm getting a little nostalgic about this pregnancy. It's almost over.
It probably doesn't help that I have finished all three seasons of Big Love. That show is so entertaining! No need to use my mind at all, just sit and enjoy. I must find something else of the same caliber of entertainment ASAP. When I was on bedrest for OHSS, I got hooked on True Blood and was hoping that Season 2 would come out towards the end of the pregnancy, but I found out yesterday it does not come out until May 23rd or something like that. I'll have to go see what's going on at Blockbuster tomorrow. Or maybe I could actually attempt to use my brain and read a book. :)