Monday, November 23, 2009

The Question

I have always been very open about my infertility to anyone. But now that I have twins in me, it is like having a big sign on my forehead that says "I did fertility treatments." Sometimes it irritates me, and at other times I am my usual self telling people the gory details (yes ma'am, my babies were made in a dish) to watch people squirm with discomfort trying to figure out how to proceed. As I've mentioned before, making people feel uncomfortable is kind of a sick pleasure I have as a hobby.

At work last week we had a large meeting. My boss wanted to announce my pregnancy to everyone. Considering the fact I have shouted it from the rooftops this shouldn't seem odd but I HATE announcing it to random people. Why you might ask? People think preggos are public property. They either tell you their unsolicited advice (see previous post), ask you personal questions like "are you doing to breastfeed," rub on your belly, or slobber all over you because it's so sweet and cute.

I am comfortable with NONE of this. First of all, I don't care about your opinion unless I have explicitly asked for it. Second of all, hold up, my breasts, my business! Don't look at them, talk about them, or think about them. What I do with my boobies is not your concern. Third, do NOT touch me unless you've asked and I've allowed it.

And then the question. People ask this because then they know if you are just a super baby maker or if your babies are "test tube" babies (ick, I hate that!).

"Do twins run in your family?"

I answer this differently everytime. Sometimes it makes me feel irritated, sometimes I just answer, and sometimes I am actually sad. Don't get me wrong, I am thrilled to death about my two babies and thank the universe everyday for them. We feel really blessed to be having two monkey's at once. But it's kind of a reminder that I won't ever be normal after infertility. But who needs to be normal? Did I ever actually consider myself "normal"?

I've tried to think of something snarky to say back to make me feel satisfied. A friend helped me with this. So here we go:

Nosy knob :"Oh how wonderful! Do twins run in your family?"

Me: "They do now bitch!" :)

11 comments:

  1. LOL! HI-larious!

    I love thinking of snarky come-backs to people's stupidity, even if I'd never use them in actual life. My sisters and I used to have to think of them when people would make snide/inappropriate comments about the amount of kids in our family. We figured what went on in our parent's bedroom was of no business to ANYONE! lol

    I also read a couple of other posts on your blog, and I've got to say that the women in your pregnancy group need to zip it! I mean, seriously? I have enough opinions to keep you occupied for quite awhile, but what someone else does with their family is their own business. Unless they're putting their children in physical danger (like NOT putting their kids in a car seat or whatever), I'm not going to thrust my opinions on them! Geez!

    Anyway...after that ramble...Happy ICLW!

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  2. They do now bitch!!!! Hilarious! People suck. First they bug you about getting married. The second you are married, they obsess over when you will get KU. You get PG, and they want to know your family history.

    ICLW

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  3. WOW!!! I never thought of that happening! Your come back is perfect! Have a great day!

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  4. LOL, I love it! My plan is just to say...Nope! They were a surprise!! I mean, they kind of were, right? ;-)

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  5. I love your response. I think the "do twins run in your family" question is so passive-aggressive.

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  6. Ashley, you crack me up. I love your comeback and your general wit.

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  7. Great comeback! Yeah, why do people think that once a woman becomes pregnant, her life, her body, and her entire medical history are suddenly common property for everyone to paw over at will..?

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  8. I seriously just about peed my pants! That is hilarious I hope you really use it on someone :) Thanks!

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  9. I have no idea why pregnancy is a free for all for asking rude and personal questions. Your comeback is fantastic. Love it!

    ICLW

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  10. my response to that was... 'no, but they run in my ivf cycle.'

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