Saturday, July 25, 2009

Random Thoughts from Yours Truly

Yes, it is Saturday night and I'm at home on the computer. Total loserville, I know. Unfortunately, I'm a little bit too psychotic to wander in public too much at this time. My dearest husband is also working (still, on a Saturday!) to bring in some last minute extra dough for my next IVF meds bill. My 11 hours of sleep Thursday night f-ed me up and I went to bed late last night and woke up ready to go at 6:45 a.m. this morning. I don't even do that during the work week when I'm supposed to be up at that time (I love you snooze button).

If you know me, you are about to be in shock and awe. If you don't know me, this will be really boring and average. I was productive all day! You heard right, ALL DAY!!! You will never believe this, but I repainted my kitchen on my own. No help from handy Mike. I taped, primed, and double coated my kitchen in a gorgeous coat of new red paint. My favorite color! Mike and I wandered Home Depot drooling on kitchen cabinets. I reorganized some of the donated clothes I received for fosters and moved them down to the kids rooms. I collected to bags of trash from the upstairs living areas. I'm a disgusting slob, so I know two bags of trash sound terrible, but not so much for me.

I have to busy myself so that my heart doesn't explode from the anxiety that I'm feeling. I'm getting so scared that this won't work. I am trying to change my attitude and be confident, but it's getting tougher and tougher. And I haven't even started stims yet (if you are a non-IFer, that means injections that stimulate your ovaries. If you are a non-IFer, "IF" means infertility).

Other random thoughts I've had today:

- I am truly obsessed with Lady Gaga's "Love Game" song and video. She's a bad ass. The only sad thing is that I have young children at my work who like this song and it is incredibly disturbing to hear a sweet little one singing "I wanna take a ride on your disco stick." Yeah, gross . . .

- Does anyone watch MTV's "16 and Pregnant?" Because I'm a masochist of the worst kind, I do. I absolutely loved the teenage couple who gave their baby up for adoption. So brave and amazing! I was moved to tears a few times. When the adoptive couple came in and said they tried to have a baby but haven't been able to I thought of all of what they'd probably been through and it saddened me. The other girls, though, were awful. Dumb as hell! I'm not just saying that out of jealousy because some 16 year old idiot got knocked up by accident (using a condom takes a rocket scientist), but truly because they just act like morons. Especially a young one named Farrah. She needs a good, hard bitch slapping. If you hate yourself, here is the link to watch the finale where there is a little bit of all the dumb asses.

-On Thursday I drove by Planned Parenthood and there were all these people standing outside of it with tape over their mouths and their hands in the air praying. Come to find out they are religious protesters of Planned Parenthood. First of all, we should have all prayed that the aforementioned fertile young ladies had found a Planned Parenthood somewhere. Secondly, I wonder how many of them are foster parents? As a foster parent myself, I do not believe that you have any right to stand outside of anywhere to protest abortion if you yourself are not doing anything about it. If you are not taking care of the many unwanted children who were abused and neglected by parents who should have never been parents and attempt to deal with their needs, I think it's a little hypocritical. I know everyone is not cut out to be a foster parent, but actions speak louder than words. I guess I should say, actions speak louder than standing around with tape on your mouth. Just to be fair, I think I'll stop and ask next time. Anyhow, that was on my mind for a bit today. I'm sure this will anger and offend some of you. Sorry. I wish all people who got pregnant by accident and can't handle it would give their baby up for adoption, but that's probably not what will happen. Sad.

- I can't believe summer is almost over! I actually have had a wonderful summer and is sad it's over, but praying that it will lead to a new chapter, the best one ever, in my life. Last summer I was sad the whole time, this summer I enjoyed myself. Below you will find a photobucket slideshow for some highlights!


  1. Ok I'm commenting too much, I know. Saw the 16 and Pregnant too. Unfortunately, so all of them. How awesome is that Tyler kid telling his dad he didn't know how to be a parent?

  2. I swear, that teenager couple was amazing! That kid Tyler looks all of 10 years old and to be able to stand up to his parents because he made that decision was awesome. I really loved that episode. I was so impressed by them, it was nice to get a glimpse into the lives of someone who would give another couple such an awesome gift.


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