I have been plagued by a recurring nightmare since hubby and I started thinking about babies. I am big, round, jolly and pregnant. Much to my excitement, it's now "time." Hubby and I go to the hospital and I push and push and feel the pain. And then there's nothing. No baby. I am so confused. Everyone just looks at me and then leaves. Where is my baby? I lay there for awhile and then panic. When no one helps, I just leave as well.
This dream has always had the power to completely ruin my day. I know that scientifically dreams are meaningless and are not predictors of the future. But it has always bothered me.
A few weeks ago I had a dream, not a nightmare. It was after the IVF was complete and I had an ultrasound. There were two little babies, perfectly formed and healthy, floating around in my body. It was already 12 weeks and I felt good and confident. I felt the joy that I've been waiting to feel for years. I had a fabulous day that day! As soon as I woke up I told hubby all about it and felt excited for the possibilities.
Scientifically, I know this is no premonition of things to come in the future. But I'm going to treat it as a little gift from the universe to keep me going towards my dream of being a mommy! If only in dreams, I got to experience that joy for a moment.