Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Must Order Baby Beat

As of 10w4d, I had three ultrasounds. When you find out you are pregnant, you are considered 4 weeks so I had to wait two weeks for the first ultrasound so if you do the math I have had pretty frequent ultrasounds. The high I experience from knowing my babies are alive and well lasts about 5 days before psychosis kicks in.

It has been a week and a half. If I pretend to be someone of sound mind, I will make it gracefully until my next appointment November 16th (or whenever the damn perinatal specialist calls to set up my appointment). There is no way in hell I am going to survive a full month without knowing that the babies are still kicking (figuratively, man I wish I could feel that already). I had severe cramping on Saturday night and could not eat, but drank lots of fluids. There was no bleeding and this does happen so I spent all of Sunday in bed drinking water. The cramps went away and still no bleeding. But nonetheless, I still worry.

I have a few options. Call the OB and tell her I am a few french fries short of a happy meal and do not have the mental capacity to make it to the 16th and please, pretty please will she check on the babies for me? Or I could make up something legit so she has to see me. Or I could order the Baby Beat and see if that works first.

The Baby Beat is a home doppler used to pick up the heart beats. You can rent it relatively cheaply. I think this is the best option because I still appear to be a normal person but can check up on the babies myself when I need to. Hubby is very opposed to this idea. He says we need to leave them alone and let them grow. He also says I will use it improperly, convince myself there are no heartbeats because I wasn't using it right, and we will be paying the big bucks when we rush to the ER because I have convinced myself something is wrong with them. I hate to admit that does sound like something that could happen, but I was up at 5:45 a.m. this morning figuring out what I could do to make sure the babies are okay!! Not to mention I have had the hell of a headache the last two days, went home from work early, and have had a rebirth of morning sickness.

I know I'm crazy so it's okay for you to think that. I just need to know that my babies are okay. I need them to be born and healthy and I need to be their mommy. After Baby A waving at me last week, there is so much more at stake.

Maybe I'll get a hobby. Or at least I could maybe clean my house. Put some new music on the iPod. Read a book. This idle mind business is not good for me. I can put a lot of things on my list, but I will tell you that the thing that will happen eventually is a BabyBeat Fetal Doppler arriving on my doorstep before the week is out.


  1. Yikes, girl. I don't think you're nuts; I say call the OB. She/he knows what you've been through, right? They hopefully will understand and allow an ultrasound or whatever. Your peace in mind is important for this pregnancy. Do whatever you think you need, and no, you aren't crazy.

  2. I would buy the doppler too. Actually, when my time comes, that will be the first purchase. I will want to check the heartbeat as often as I can. So you've got me on board.

  3. Hi I'm not sure if there is some unwritten rule of conduct where I'm not supposed to say this, but I think I'll pop if I don't...
    I've really enjoyed reading your blog and just since your post about strollers, I've realized that we might live in the same county and I'm pretty sure we have the same blonde headed, Dr. B.
    We are about to begin IVF with her and your success and stories have been SO uplifting. Thanks for sharing!

  4. You're allowed to be a bit crazy, don't worry! P.S. check out my blog today for some award noms ;-)

  5. I say buy the Baby Beat and use it right before an ultrasound. That way if for some reason you can't get it working you will have a backup soon to check on the babies. Then in the future you would be sure to know how to use it properly...? And none of this sounds a bit crazy to me. Ok, crazy maybe, but understandable definitely. :)


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