My son is high maintenance. He always has been. With great guilt I can even remember a very sleep deprived moment where I thought I might have to take him to the fire station and leave him at the anonymous infant drop off.
The boy is almost two and he rarely goes to bed without a fight. He cries and wants to be held and snuggled. We never did any type of sleep training with them, even though everyone under the sun told us to do it and how it would change our life.
Osh man was crying and carrying on again after bedtime. I tried to ignore him, but each time without fail I end up in his room trying to comfort him. He mostly prefers Hubby to do this, but in sheer desperation he will settle for me.
I walked in and he reached up to me. I did the other sin of not only going in there instead of letting him cry, but removing him from his bed. He wrapped his arms around my neck and I kissed him on the head. I laid him acrossed my chest and rocked him back and forth and sang him some songs.
I do this against my better judgement because my babies are both growing so fast. I know that well before I am ready, some girl will be wrapping her arms around my boy's neck and he will find his comfort in her. When that happens I am going to want more than anything to go back in time, to this time, when I get to rock him in my arms and watch his beautiful eyes close and his amazing lashes fall across his cheeks. His mouth falls open and he starts to snore, all while keeping his little hand clutched to my shirt so he knows Mommy can't go anywhere. I give him all the comfort he needs and make him feel safe. It is the greatest feeling.
No one has invented that time machine yet, so every night when I know I should be teaching him patience and it is a real pain in my rear to have to go in there several times before he falls asleep, I still find joy in it. My little loves won't be little forever. Even though I am excited to see what they grow up to be, I want to immerse myself in these small moments that are flashing before my eyes.
One week from tomorrow my little nuggets will be two!