Sometimes being a super awesome parent and savoring each moment of parenthood is not always on my priority list.
I know I should never admit that, but it's true.
For example, I have totally screwed up my son by sleeping in his crib. I know it's the cool thing to co-sleep these days and there are moments every now and then when I love waking up next to a warm and cuddly toddler, but for the most part, I feel like my bed is for me and Hubby. Kids can sleep in their own damn bed.
I thought it was pure genius that I would get into my children's cribs. It would teach them that of course I want to snuggle them when they need it, but I sure as hell don't really want them in my bed anytime they want to be. This was not a genius move because many a night Osh man will pat his pillow and say "get in Mommy" or "lay down Mommy."
This is a lot tougher these days because he is bigger and takes up more space in our iKea crib, which aren't the gigantic numbers you get at Babies 'R Us. People say I shouldn't be climbing in there anymore because I'm pregnant. They are right, but not because of the baby, because my big butt is 20 lbs. heavier from eating pop tarts and dairy milk for every meal.
Many times, I snuggle next to him and he wraps his arms around me and I love it. His precious face next to mine. The fact that my mere presence provides so much comfort to him. My ability to just smooch his sweet cheeks at close range as many times as I feel compelled. The knowledge that someday I am going to look back and be so thankful for these moments that we once shared when he is a teenager giving me the bird and telling me to go eff myself because I don't want him making out with his girlfriend and smoking a blunt in the driveway. These little things are the best moments in motherhood and I try to soak them up with every fiber of my being.
For the most part.
Some nights, though, I just want him to go to sleep. I don't want him waking up everytime I try to Mission Impossible ninja style remove myself silently from his crib with my extra heavy pop tart thighs barking "mommy , lay down or I wake up!" at me. Or, Heaven help me, he could just go to sleep on his own. Some nights I just want to put him to bed and then put myself in my bed at a decent time to watch my new True Blood Season 4 DVD while eating more pop tarts.
It's all a balance I guess.
Bad news . . . .I am behind on uploading pics. Sorry!