Sunday, October 9, 2011


An Amber Alert came on this week saying a child is missing in our area. 9 times out of 10, it's a custody thing. Now it's a major news story and it scared the holy hell out of me.

Not this time friends. The little girl was taken through her bedroom window in the night and there are no clues as to her whereabouts. You probably saw her on the news, Lisa Irwin and she was taken less than 30 miles from my house!

Like every nutbag mom out there, I randomly get up and check on my kiddos. I know it's crazy, but I just like to see them sleeping and also to know they are still breathing. The fact that they are in their cribs is just a given to me, I don't worry that they are missing, just that something randomly might have made them sick or stop breathing or something. So to walk into Ocean and Ever's room and them be gone is just not something I can even think about.

I told hubby that I would like for him to install some barbed wire around the babies' bedroom window. I received a blank and concerned stare as an answer.

Me: Honey, I am 100% serious about this. I'm not kidding.

Hubby: Um, dear, we have an alarm system. Can't we just use that?

Me: No, that just makes noise. Will the alarm system stab someone in the knee cap or scrape their hands off if they try to steal our babies? No it won't. I want physical pain for the person who thinks they are going to take my little monkeys out of their window.

Hubby: Ok.

Then he stared at me some more like a crazy person. I think it's a great idea. If he won't do it, certainly someone wouldn't charge me too much for that, right?

This morning we were all herding outside (the monkeys and me) to get into the car and head to daycare/work. An old lady was walking her dog past my front yard. The twins stopped to stare. Ever spit at them because she has behavior issues, but that's for another post. Then she started asking about if they are twins, how old are they, oh they are so beautiful, etc. I smiled and then she walked away and the light bulb came on. Kidnapper!! I just gave information about my kids in front of my home and she knows the two cutest 17 month olds in the whole wide world live in this very house! I'm screwed! Any smart kidnapper would try to kidnap these two, I mean really. They are adorable times a million.

So then I thought maybe we should get a gun, but then I remembered we are anti-guns and the likelihood that your spouse will kill you with it one day or your child will find and maim or kill themselves with it are statistically way higher than the likelihood we would shoot and kill a home invader. I'm thinking a high powered tazer is the best choice? That way if by some horrible incident when the kids are older and they find it and shoot themselves they will still live but we could definitely stop someone in their tracks if we needed to. Right?

Anyway, this whole thing is so sad and terrible for this family and it has made me totally insane, as you can clearly see.


What Ever does with crayons . . .


This is hubby's physics homework by the way, oops!

What Osh does with crayons . . . . .



  1. I heard about that little girl. Soooo sad! and I'm right there with you in the crazy protecting my child club. No shame! :)

  2. I am in St. Louis and this story plays often on the news. Since it aired I can't stop thinking about my Maddie being taken. There is a window that we often forget to close at night and now I am OCD about checking it for fear of someone breaking in and taking her. It is a scary world we now live in!

  3. I'm on the East Coast, but that story still got me worried about my daughter. She has two windows in her bedroom, and one of them doesn't have the screen because we've yet to put it back in after taking out the air conditioners. I was going to stop using her crib that sounds an alarm after about 5 seconds if there is no movement in the crib...but after hearing about that kidnapping, I've continued to use it. And, I now have a golf club with a steel shaft within arm's reach at night. Yup, add me to the list of crazy, insane moms protecting their children.

  4. I can't even read that story. That sweet baby's face ... I can't imagine that happening... I can't let my mind go there.

    At least Oshie isn't putting crayons in his nose ... yet...

  5. Love the crayon cigarette! Too funny!

    So sad about that baby. I had no idea. I hope there's a happy ending. :(


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