Yes, pick your jaw up off the floor.
This is their third time doing something like this. The longest we have been apart is 9 days. I can't tell you how many times I say this to someone and they gasp and say "omg, I would NEVER let my children leave without me. I never even spend one night without my child. How can you do that? I just can't imagine allowing my family to take my child from me" and so on and so forth.
I don't LOVE to be away from my kids. In fact, two days in I had a good cry. It's really strange and crazy to go from a house of loud terror to one sleepy little newborn. BUT - I knew they would love it.
I am not controlling mom. Most moms I know fall into this category but I don't. I absolutely adored when I got to take special trips with my grandparents or go spend the night with my aunt. I didn't love it because my parents didn't love me or I hated my parents and wanted to get away from them or we aren't bonded properly to each other. I loved it because it's fun to get away. It's fun to enjoy a new experience. I love my extended family and love to be near them and have special time with them. So? My extended family members are incredibly important me and I adore them. I am thrilled that my kids get to experience the same.
The day that the twins left they woke up and saw their Sesame Street suitcases packed up. They came running downstairs. I told them they were going on an adventure with Grandma and Grampa. We got dressed, got their special blankies and they waited anxiously by the door. I did not feel jealous or weird. They were so excited and I was excited for them. It was adorable. They could not wait for their special adventure.
I feel great that my kid's are so well adjusted that they can enjoy the company of family and don't need to be under my feet at all times. I know this is hard as a mom and yes, I too cry at the end of Toy Story 3 every.single.time watching Andy go off to college, but the truth of life is, your kids are going to leave you someday. Sooner rather than later you will drop them off at Kindergarten. A girl or boy will come by to sweep your child off their feet and they will have a life of their own. You will take them to driver's ed and unleash them unto the world in a vehicle. They will graduate high school and you will send them off to college. They will get married and you will give them to someone else. I know these are sad things, but they are real things. I want my kids to look at the world and spread their wings and fly out into it. Therefore, I can handle a nine day separation from them while they go get their own adventure with Grandma.
Besides, you may recall that my mom took a year off of her life, moved out of her state and into our house to help me take care of the twins. She isn't really like extended family, she is like the 6th member of our immediate family. Basically, if Grandma wants some twin time, we try to make it happen.When little kids don't see people for awhile it is sometimes hard for them to remember family members, but no matter the time or distance when Grandma shows up these two are ready to roll. This is a morbid thought, but if something ever happens to us and we leave this earth before our children do, I know that they have a strong and special bond with someone else and that makes that horrifying thought a little bit easier.
And that's the story. Good for you if you NEVER spend time away from your kids, but I do. I'll give you a pat on the back for your dedication, but this is our life and we like it this way. I'm proud of my kiddos and I think Hubby and I are awesome.
My little gymnasts
I'm with you. I know kiddo has a blast going to spend time with grandma and grandpa and we enjoy the time too. I know some moms can't stand the thought of leaving even for a night and that's fine too but I think it is healthy for all involved!
ReplyDeleteI envy those who have family members in their lives who WILL take kids. My parents are hands off--they like to visit and they like to leave. Hub's dad is a anxiety-ridden recovering alcoholic (not the best fit for a toddler) and hub's mom is someone who can't be trusted behind a wheel and would probably forget she had a toddler around. Seriously, so dingy and unreliable. I wouldn't even trust her with my pup!
ReplyDeleteAnyway, that's why I have never been without A in 16 months. What do we plan to do when baby #2 comes? We'll be paying the sitter to stay with him when we head to the hospital.
I think there are probably a lot more moms like me who have shitty or unreliable family members.
It's really awesome that you have family who will take the twins. Mine are all about an hour or so at a time and then go about their business, they are all very busy. Besides that though, I wouldn't feel comfortable sending them away for so long ONLY because my son takes medication 6 times a day and its easy to forget to give him, so I don't trust that they would remember. Also, even in a short amount of time of babysittin almost all of them have forgotten, so no. But I can't wait for when I can! Enjoy it ;)
ReplyDeleteI'm honestly a little jealous! I WISH my in-laws or my parents would take them!!! I would love for them to get to spend some time with their grandparents. I remember vividly spending at least one weekend a month with my mom's parents, and I LOVED it! So, I totally get it! Now both sets of grandparents live in town, and they both see the kids all the time, and I don't think they want to take them for any extended period of time. I'd sure welcome the break though!
ReplyDeleteSo glad you are getting some one on one bonding time with the newest peanut!!!